I’m lonely and want to be “a part of.” Funny that the only apparent solution for this dilemma is to separate myself from the few that I do know, to venture out to a “better land” where I might find the comfort that my heart desires. It’s time.

When I made the Vineyard Long Beach my home church 13 months ago it would have been too small had I required a church where a significant other and her children would be able to attend and find ministries to suit their needs. But being the lone rogue all I needed was good music and good teaching. Oh yeah, I knew I needed to plug into an accountability group, especially if I was going to play music. So it really was too small a year ago when we had three rows of seats occupied. There have been a number of times over the past three months when there were only three of us (the other worship leader, the pastor and moi) at 10 when church was supposed to begin. I joked one Sunday when it was just the three of us and a single attendee, “So what’s your take on the Rapture again?” That was funny. But now the joke has gotten to the point where I miss the fellowship of hanging out with the other band members like I did at Newport, or just the weekly discussions and teaching in Santa Ana with Chris and the gang. I’m not looking for an audience, just a functioning family. JBB